Thursday, July 27, 2006
speaking of dumb ass folk...
50% of U.S. now says Iraq had WMD @ start of war...
This has to be the people who voted for him the second time and several herion addicts...
Just goes to show you what Fox News can do!...
Mass media pundits with platforms that can barely hold the ego...
While they say nothing of fact...
(slinks away in total disgust thinking how people can be such frickin' idiots at times)...
This has to be the people who voted for him the second time and several herion addicts...
Just goes to show you what Fox News can do!...
Mass media pundits with platforms that can barely hold the ego...
While they say nothing of fact...
(slinks away in total disgust thinking how people can be such frickin' idiots at times)...
Monday, July 24, 2006
Friday, July 21, 2006
What I said is this...
Some dumbass from Texas gets himself elected governor.
To do this the powers that be inside the elephant...fart him out.
They decide that he needs...'public appeal'...
Through a consortium he becomes 'part owner' of a major league baseball team...
The elephant continues to fart...
They run him for President of the United States...
(After all...His Daddy was one)...
Using scare tactics and lying just as his father did...He wins...
He is advised by Mr. Scare Tatic himself...Dick Cheney...
He begins to think this actually might work on more than one occasion...
9/11 happens...
He finds himself without answers...
He resorts to selling fear...and war...and war...and fear...
And the people buy it...
They hold him up high against all forces of evil...
Only to find out he is a paper tiger...
With little or no experience in the jungle...
Created by a giant elephant fart...
And now the elephants can't stand to be around him either...
The stink is just getting too strong!...
What did you think I said?
To do this the powers that be inside the elephant...fart him out.
They decide that he needs...'public appeal'...
Through a consortium he becomes 'part owner' of a major league baseball team...
The elephant continues to fart...
They run him for President of the United States...
(After all...His Daddy was one)...
Using scare tactics and lying just as his father did...He wins...
He is advised by Mr. Scare Tatic himself...Dick Cheney...
He begins to think this actually might work on more than one occasion...
9/11 happens...
He finds himself without answers...
He resorts to selling fear...and war...and war...and fear...
And the people buy it...
They hold him up high against all forces of evil...
Only to find out he is a paper tiger...
With little or no experience in the jungle...
Created by a giant elephant fart...
And now the elephants can't stand to be around him either...
The stink is just getting too strong!...
What did you think I said?
Saturday, July 15, 2006
Friday, July 14, 2006
Blatantly adapted from...The A Side...
Dear Righteous Human;
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law.
I have learned a great deal from you and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can.
I do need some advice from you however, regarding some other elements of God's Law and how to follow them.
1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9.
The problem is my neighbors.
They claim the odor is not pleasing to them.
Should I smite them?
Here is how I saw it happening!
"And he did go forth and smite the sinners with his mighty grill cover and extra large BBQ fork"...
Yes... It needs work...But can you tell me if I am on the right track?
It's just that I already own these items and did not budget for smiting neighbors this year...
2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned inExodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
And even then we have to find someone who is extremely hairy faced with great vision...
Sheesh!...Nothing worth doing is easy it seems...
3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
One of them actually 'forced' me into un-clean contact...
Ok...Maybe 'forced' is the wrong term but the question remains...
4. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians? I also like Italian food. Can I have an Italian cook-slave?
5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus35:2. The passage clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
Or, may I be vindicated and rendered clean with a contract hit?
6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree.
Can you settle this?
Are there 'degrees' of abomination?
One other thing...wtf?...Why should I care?
7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses.Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here? I mean all that turn to stone stuff is pretty scary...I really want to get this right!
8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.19:27. How should they die?
But...thou shalt not kill!
Here is an idea...What about suspended animation?
We put them in this box thing and you zap them with some...
Deep Heaven Karma!...
In a few more thousand years I'm sure we will have figured this one out!
9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?...No!...Really!...Seriously!...
10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev.20:14)I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that anyone named 'Bush' is eternal and unchanging.
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law.
I have learned a great deal from you and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can.
I do need some advice from you however, regarding some other elements of God's Law and how to follow them.
1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9.
The problem is my neighbors.
They claim the odor is not pleasing to them.
Should I smite them?
Here is how I saw it happening!
"And he did go forth and smite the sinners with his mighty grill cover and extra large BBQ fork"...
Yes... It needs work...But can you tell me if I am on the right track?
It's just that I already own these items and did not budget for smiting neighbors this year...
2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned inExodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
And even then we have to find someone who is extremely hairy faced with great vision...
Sheesh!...Nothing worth doing is easy it seems...
3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
One of them actually 'forced' me into un-clean contact...
Ok...Maybe 'forced' is the wrong term but the question remains...
4. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians? I also like Italian food. Can I have an Italian cook-slave?
5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus35:2. The passage clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
Or, may I be vindicated and rendered clean with a contract hit?
6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree.
Can you settle this?
Are there 'degrees' of abomination?
One other thing...wtf?...Why should I care?
7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses.Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here? I mean all that turn to stone stuff is pretty scary...I really want to get this right!
8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.19:27. How should they die?
But...thou shalt not kill!
Here is an idea...What about suspended animation?
We put them in this box thing and you zap them with some...
Deep Heaven Karma!...
In a few more thousand years I'm sure we will have figured this one out!
9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?...No!...Really!...Seriously!...
10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev.20:14)I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that anyone named 'Bush' is eternal and unchanging.
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Monday, July 10, 2006
Food for Thought...
The thug is aware that loudness convinces sixty persons where reasoning convinces but one...
Mark Twain...
Mark Twain...
Ok...I'm not exactly a n00b to the net...
There are many strange things to see out there...
I have to say this is one of the most bizarre I have ever seen...Really...I'm not kidding!...
I have to say this is one of the most bizarre I have ever seen...Really...I'm not kidding!...
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
North Korea fires type'O'dong missile...
(insert giggle here)...
Burn lasts for 30 seconds...before exploding...(phhttt)!...
Six other shots fired within 24 hours...
with lesser results...(gee...that's too bad)...
(I can't even finish this)...too easy!...(insert large giggle here)...
Kim Jong-il...(rof)...
Gee!...ya think?...(lmfao)...
(That's what she said)!...
Burn lasts for 30 seconds...before exploding...(phhttt)!...
Six other shots fired within 24 hours...
with lesser results...(gee...that's too bad)...
(I can't even finish this)...too easy!...(insert large giggle here)...
Kim Jong-il...(rof)...
Gee!...ya think?...(lmfao)...
(That's what she said)!...
Posted this before...but it bears repeating...
We are always hearing of people who are around seeking after the Truth. I have never seen a (permanent) specimen. I think he has never lived. But I have seen several entirely sincere people who thought they were (permanent) Seekers after the Truth. They sought diligently, persistently, carefully, cautiously, profoundly, with perfect honesty and nicely adjusted judgment- until they believed that without doubt or question they had found the Truth. That was the end of the search.
The man spent the rest of his hunting up shingles wherewith to protect his Truth from the weather.
Mark Twain...
The man spent the rest of his hunting up shingles wherewith to protect his Truth from the weather.
Mark Twain...
Thank God!...These people have the answers!...
And if you don't believe them just ask them!
The growing darkness in America.
"... As we allow darkness to prevail on our television screens, supermarket checkouts, mall window displays, public schools, courts, even our churches (when truth is not preached boldly), and homes, darkness - Satanic themes, messages and images become legitimized, creating a hot bed for the development of more darkness (same-sex marriages, homosexuality, pre-marital sex, adultery, pornography addictions, gambling, rampant materialism, godlessness.) .. "
Anybody else think he got...ahem...just a little 'excited'...
when he wrote this?...lol...
The growing darkness in America.
"... As we allow darkness to prevail on our television screens, supermarket checkouts, mall window displays, public schools, courts, even our churches (when truth is not preached boldly), and homes, darkness - Satanic themes, messages and images become legitimized, creating a hot bed for the development of more darkness (same-sex marriages, homosexuality, pre-marital sex, adultery, pornography addictions, gambling, rampant materialism, godlessness.) .. "
Anybody else think he got...ahem...just a little 'excited'...
when he wrote this?...lol...
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